This is one of the things about Western culture (white people in particular) that drives me nuts. And this will likely offend LOTS of white people, so get ready for it. I know ya’ll are really upset that we don’t bash Whitey enough, so make sure you really soak this up, okay?

[Disclaimer: CBC has a totally different opinion than me on this, so feel free to stick up for her and bash me at will]

Animals as pets. This issue has been simmering for me, because I’ve undergone a radical transformation on the issue of animals living with people. And it came to head when I read this bit of lunacy today.

First, I was a cat lover at one point in my life. Had a couple cats, loved them to death, didn’t care that my eyes swelled shut if the hair got near me, and sobbed like a baby when my first kitty died (when I was 17). But once I had kids I really changed in a way that I didn’t expect.

Suddenly I became a germaphobe. And since one of my kids suffers from horrible excema and accompanying MRSA staph infections, being a germaphobe serves me well. Suddenly I couldn’t stand the THOUGHT of a cat being in my house. I would go to friend’s houses, where there would be cat litter pans in the bathroom….and I’d freak out. You let a pan of CAT SHIT sit in your bathroom? Are you freaking serious? How revolting.

But then it was more than just the cat pan that got me feeling grossed out. Suddenly it was the animal hair…the thought of pet dander all over my kids’ beds…the thought of those nasty little animals dragging their buttholes across my carpet (That stupid chick actually thought that was funny. And I didn’t see any carpet cleaner nearby. D-I-S-G-U-S-T-I-N-G. If that were my rug I would have torn it up and thrown it in the dumpster)…the fact that animals lick their asses and then lick people’s faces. How can human beings live like that, and with children in the house???

Then it was the way friends’ dogs stuck their noses in everybody’s crotch, and ate the toads that hopped around on the sidewalk after dark. Bloody toad messes on the driveway. Yum.

And then I started to wonder why people in the West treat these beasts like they are children. We honestly talk about about our “furry family members” and how we dropped $1000 at the vet for little Tigger to get his kidneys assessed. Seriously. We are freaking NUTS. The woman in that article above actually compared her cats to her own son, and went without her own blood pressure medication so she could medicate her cats (who are so old they are going to die soon anyway). Wonder how her son feels about his wacko mother endangering her own health for the sake of her cats?

Do we, as Americans, truly think that if we are so poor we need government assistance and food stamps to FEED OURSELVES, that we should still be taking on the burden of feeding pets? Could we really be this pampered? This silly?

And here we come to crux of the issue.

Asians get this. When Ang was growing up in China people did not have animals living in their homes with them. And from CBC’s comments here, I gather that it is completely foreign to Indian culture as well. And yes, I know that some Koreans eat dogs. But you know what? I don’t find that nearly as offensive as I would have at 17.

In fact, I am in total solidarity with Asians on this topic. Animals belong in barns. White people are freaking crazy. We think we’re so enlightened, and that only savages would treat dogs and cats, like, well, animals. I think this is a case of the pendulum swinging too far in the other direction. In some ways we in the West are really “enlightened” (you know, how we don’t chain women to the house and make them wear bags over their heads) — but in this case I think we are way over-indulged.

There is one exception: seeing-eye dogs, or other animals like that.

[Commence screeching from all the pet owners!]

(I stole this from one of my blogging friends, it was so hilarious. “Existential Cat”)