Maamej at Border Crossings found our site and was jealous (irritated? J) that we didn’t have a “Hair” category. This is true – I don’t think Chinese Ambassador or I have any hair issues with our mixed race kids. In fact, I love my daughter’s hair – it seems to be a combination of the best of both of our hair. Her hair isn’t as coarse or thick as Indian hair, instead finer like mine. And the color is a medium dark brown with some auburn highlights that lighten quite a bit in the summer. It has a slight natural wave (from MIL I think) that gets curlier when it’s humid.

I like to play with her hair, all the time braiding it and twisting it, putting decorations in it. We have a whole drawer full of hair accessories (girls are so much fun that way!). She loves picking out what ponies to wear and admires the waves in the mirror when we take braids out. And I promise this isn’t the point of the post – not trying to make Maamej throw virtual tomatoes at me!

Anyway, I have always let DD’s hair grow. I have it trimmed regularly, but always like it long and now it’s about between her shoulder blades. Every since her hair started growing past her ears (at about 1), MIL has wanted me to cut it. She doesn’t come out and say that’s what she wants, but I know that’s it. She always asks these roundabout questions or makes seemingly random statements instead of being direct.

When DD’s hair got longer, MIL started saying all the time, “DD’s hair has so much static. It’s everywhere!” We heard the static comment for almost 2 years. The other question she still asks (though not as frequently) is, “Are you letting her hair grow long?” (which obviously I am). Variations include, “Does DD like her hair long?” The static comments were the funniest.

Though she still has never said, what MIL really wanted us to do was cut DD’s hair in a bowl haircut. I’ve noticed a large number of Indian girls with bowl haircuts – usually between the ages of 1 and 8 or 9 (about the time when girls start becoming really vocal about their own hair styles). I noticed this haircut trend before we ever had DD. Every time we’d go to the mall, there would be Indian girls with the bowl cut. I asked Saresh why the parents did this because they have such gorgeous, thick, shiny hair! Being a man, he never noticed before I said something, had no idea why and didn’t really care (still doesn’t). He would probably think this entire post is stupid. If I asked MIL what’s up with the bowl cut, she’d just bob her head from side to side making the noncommittal “mmm…” sound.

When I do DD’s hair in a fancy updo or put Pippi Longstocking braids in it, MIL loves it. She still can’t stop herself from commenting about the length though – there must be some inner Indian hairdo conflict. The most direct she’s come is to ask me recently just how long I’m going to let it grow. “I have no idea,” made her bob her head (I’d rather not guess at the meaning). Saresh’s aunt asks me, too, with a kind of half bemused half confused look (maybe it’s a “what’s up with these white girls?” look?). So do the other aunties. I got asked about 3 times at the last party, all the same question in the same odd tone, “Are you letting her hair grow long?” Maybe I’m imagining the tone, but it is kind of funny how concerned everyone seems to be with her hair. I imagine them itching to grab a bowl and some scissors when I’m not looking.

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